What on earth does it mean to seek His kingdom first? What does that mean to me? What does that look like? How can I possibly do that?
The other day I realized what this truly does look like to my family and I. You know when you let go of things that truly mean a lot to you – like your family’s financial status or your family’s health. These two “big dogs” can rock your world when they are shaken up.
At the very moment when you feel pressure in either of these two areas, all of the sudden your ability to control the world around you starts to crumble. Life gets hard. Struggle erupts throughout the household. Thoughts of “what if” begin popping up in your daily thoughts and dreams at night. Sleepless nights ensue. Cravings of “things” to fill us in this empty world grow larger. Prayer is essential to stir up hope again.
God sometimes calls us to do some really hard things. Recently this has happened in my own family. We have fought it for years because it seems hard and honestly, it seems uncomfortable. We have pushed it off because surely, God does not want us to do that – right God? It was more than a stretch for us, and it was scary because of all the unknowns that come with doing His Will. Yet, it also made sense. Weird right?
Then I came across this scripture when I was discerning God’s Will:
Mark 1:16-20 As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.” At once they left their nets and followed him. When he had gone a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John in a boat, preparing their nets. Without delay he called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men and followed him.
God rocked Simon and Andrew and James and John with His Will. God sent Jesus to call these four men to leave behind everything. He not only asked them to drop their nets and follow Him, He asked them to leave their livelihood, their financial status, and the only job they knew to FOLLOW HIM. What on earth? I am not so sure I would have gone so willingly.
But FIRST seek His Kingdom is what the scripture says. It doesn’t say, first make sure your family is financially secure and then follow Him. Jesus didn’t whisper to Simon and Andrew , “Heh, do you have a solid 401k plan because you are going to need it for what I am calling you to do?” He didn’t ask questions about their family’s health status or their health insurance plans to ensure they were able and ready to follow Him. Nope. God asks that we FIRST seek His Kingdom, and then all these things will be given to you as well.
Darn that God. God had been slowly unveiling what His Will looked like to me over many weeks, months and years of praying. I knew it was scary. I knew it was out of my comfort zone. But crazy enough, I also knew it was secure because it was His plan. Somehow through the fear and the worry, I could see God’s Light shining through. It seemed crazy, but I had really been praying for God to show me the right path. More importantly, I was asking God to Light up His path and make my eyes look only toward it. I prayed for God to show me the road to FIRST seek His Kingdom. And ultimately, I knew if I did find His Will for me, then all those things (the “what if” relievers) would be given to me as well eliminating all my “what if” thoughts and dreams.
Yes, seeking His Kingdom FIRST, was going to be a long, hard road. It might rock my world for a while. It might shake up what I thought was important in life. In the end, it would unveil a beautiful life where I FIRST seek His Kingdom. When I do that – when I FIRST seek His Kingdom – then He will ensure that I have all I need.