“She Speaks” Anxiety

Picture WindowAs I sit looking out my picture window in my home, I cannot help but think of the days ahead. Last year, I committed to writing God’s message for anyone and everyone to read. After my first book was published in September of 2012, I realized that finally I had found a passion for something. My daily blogs along with speaking engagements has allowed me to take a long look at my own faith life.

I have been dissecting and nitpicking at my own faith life to reveal that everyone has struggles and God is needed to get us through those bumps, hills and even mountains in life. This past February, I took a deep plunge into the unknown – I signed up for the She Speaks 2013 Conference in Charlotte, North Carolina. It made me a little uncomfortable (that is to put it mildly). I am squirming thinking about the unknown of it all.

When you come face to face with inspiration it is hard not to be in awe of that person or persons. Proverbs 31 is a true inspiration for my own writing. To name a few others: Joanna Weaver, Sarah Young, and many, many more Christian writers. They have all touched my heart and ignited a fierce determination inside of me to let women know that God loves them. God wants to spend time with them. They are not alone in their daily work struggles, home struggles and life struggles.

So as I prepare for the workshop this upcoming Wednesday, I am face to face with fear. I know you all are going to remind me that fear is False Expectations Appearing Real. I know. I know. BUT it is hard to see past this fear of facing my inspirations. What if I am not good enough? What if my speech fails miserably? What if they all laugh at what a loser my first book was?

So as I begin this weekend to prepare for the conference, please pray for me. Pray for me to get myself prepared to learn more about this great ministry that I am trying to start from scratch. Pray that I will see my mistakes and not feel burdened by them, but that I learn from them. Pray that I will keep my heart open to meeting new friends, making new connections and steering clear of envy.

I know that God has opened this door for me. I know that He needs me to share my own battles. Let me be open to doing so.

Don’t be discouraged that I don’t write for a whole week, because hopefully on Monday, July 29th, I will be back with the Holy Spirit on fire with words of encouragement and inspiration for you all to read.

Now, I am going to sit back here and look out at this beautiful view for a little longer. I can hear my kids laughing while sliding down the slip and slide. Over the hill, the three of them have created the start of a brick dog house. Yes, brick is what I said. They have spent hours this morning hauling up bricks from the creek to build the dog a beautiful home (which she doesn’t really like much, but oh well). Taking in this beautiful site just makes me relax from the anxieties of the upcoming conference. It allows me to see the beauty of today and not the fear of tomorrow.

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About aslamkowski

Blogger, Speaker and Author of "Revealing Faith: Learning to Place God First in Your Life" Most importantly, desperately wanting to hear and follow God's Will, wife of Peter and mother of three kids.
This entry was posted in Faith, Family, God, Jesus, Religion, Social Justice, Uncategorized, Women and Christianity and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to “She Speaks” Anxiety

  1. themysticmom says:

    I, for one, will be eager to hear of your experiences! I will be praying, and am sure that you will find and share much fruit on this journey!

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